THE BLACK SON RISE

   Who do I go to when I have my moments of being vulnerable? Feeling like things aren't sorting out the way I want them to, even when I pray and attempt to be as optimistic as possible. I already know that life isn't always smiles and giggles, but it has to be way more then what I'm getting now. I look at people around me who do nothing but evil and they get EVERYTHING. It appears like they live a carefree life full of happiness and prosperity while I seem to work hard for nothing. I honestly want to give up constantly because it seems like there's just no use in trying. The more trying I endeavor to do it seems like I fall deeper into my own abyss of sorrows and pain. I have the option to either keep on trying or just give up right then and there. But is giving up the easier part or is it the part of sticking with it the hardest?

   Most people will NEVER understand how it feels to be a Black Male in America unless you are one already. It doesn't matter whether you're successful, or not. When people see you you're already placed in a box of failure, drugs, violence, incarceration or being a dead beat father. What's even more sad is the fact that all of these situations have plagued the African American community seemingly forever. You turn on the television, read it in news paper, even by word of mouth you hear something about someone you know having been apart of each situation. It saddens me to know that people give up on black males like there's just no hope for US. 

   Then again, just because you have fallen deep into any or every one of those situations, it doesn't mean the end. I believe that God places us in certain situations to not only prove we can endure, but to show others it can be done. I believe that individuals find it a lot easier to judge and categorize people instead of giving them a sense of hope. A part of me doesn't believe that black males who face those issues constantly want to be where they are. I believe fear and even settling causes them to be where they are, but it isn't anyone else's place to judge. The reason I can express it the way that I have is because I am a Black Man, and I feel like God has the FINAL say in where anyone winds up going in life. Society has no right to give anyone an eternal mark, but they do it anyway.

    I think that after awhile it's human nature to judge people. It becomes the very fabric of an individuals being sometimes. However, statistics don't automatically mean failure unless you take it on internally. We have the capability to change ANYTHING if we believe within ourselves it can be changed. People should base individuals individually but they don't, and why is that? I believe; because deep down inside, they themselves are facing their own demons they constantly battle. Life is an ever changing situation, which means that people can change also. 

   Just like there are failures, there are situations of success and triumphs. I believe you have to dig deep within yourself and encourage yourself even if others don't. You MUST face life, and you don't always have to accept things for what they are either. Just as certain as the moon will rise when night falls, there's a chance for a brighter tomorrow. Believe when no one else does and achieve because it's your God given right to do so. There's a reason why God called us sons, because we have just as much power to change this world and rise to the pinnacle as the Sun rises in the morning. 

In Due season

   The Darkest hour in someone's life is when they realize the greatness they hold. It's when they realize that all they have internally will come forth. They will realize that all they believe will be achieved. I've always said that things may not happen when you want them to but they will always happen whenever you need them to. Those words so simple hold so much power and I believe them. I believe them because part of me realizes that all great things don't come overnight, or when we want them to at that moment. If things were that simple to get; how would we truly appreciate something, if we didn't understand the struggle to truly possess it? All great things don't come to an end; all that happens is something new takes the place of it.

   I won't portray myself as a person who knows it all because I don't. I won't say that I have the answers to become successful because I'm trying to figure out the answers myself. What I will say is I'm a man who has gone through a few hardships in my life to shed some light on knowing that better days are coming. Sitting around and waiting for things to change and get better won't do anything. All that will happen is time will go by and you'll find yourself years later; much older asking yourself why didn't you do more, and the only one to blame is one you see in the mirror...Yourself!

   Remembering moments when I was nearly homeless twice; going uptown to the welfare place with my family almost begging to keep our place. Fighting to stay in an apartment my grandmother had in her name for years before she passed away. Remembering how embarrassed I felt being there with my sisters and mother. Feeling like a criminal, giving my social security number; having people say we couldn't even get food stamps because my mother made too much. Then my Aunts stepped in and gave money to make sure we stayed in our home. Our Angels in disguise.

    I remember when I worked my ass off for a a company for only $7.50/hr. Me not being complacent with complacency worked my way up to an assistant manager in less then 3 months. By the time I had been there not even a year I had already been ready to run my own store. But God obviously had other plans for my life so I went from that company to another. Only being there for a month and a half I was respected by everyone I worked with and was treated like I was a manager, though I was just a sales associate. Now no longer working even for that company I truly wonder where my destiny lies?

   I realize that I am obviously meant to create my own companies, orchestrate my own ways of making a living and helping other individuals reach their fullest potential. I read somewhere that if you are truly a leader you do not make followers but create other leaders. I believe those words because I myself have taken the responsibility of realizing I am a leader. Not because I wanted to always be one, because I remember when I didn't; I've come to accept it, even embracing it because I realize that my purpose is to show others the greatness they hold within. Truly understanding other people and accepting who they are is understanding and accepting the person you are first.

    How can I proclaim to be a leader and take on the roles of leadership if I am afraid to lead? Moreover; being a leader is also understanding you don't know everything, and allowing others to lead the way when it is necessary to. You cannot be intimidated by someone else's potential or be angry if those you lead do better then you do; just take that as a sign of who you are, and the kind of people you mold into being great.

   When I find myself writing I don't ever do it for the people already established or those who appear to have it all. I do it for the have nots, the underdogs. I do it for the mother who is a single parent who gives her daughter everything she never had, and wants to be the example of a woman to her daughter she never had growing up. I do it for the man who works three jobs to make sure that his children want for nothing and his wife has the world; and though he is not rich he finds happiness in his family. I do it for those homeless people we already walk pass; judging them, telling each other "they don't have to be homeless", and not even know their story. It's easy to judge the path you never walked down when you yourself have never been down that route.

  I said all that to say that a change is going to come; a shift in fortune will cause you to see that all the trials and tribulations you have suffered, will have not been in vain. You have to believe what you can't see and realize that even when all seems lost everything will work in your favor. I would be a liar if I didn't say that as I'm writing this; I wasn't compelled to give up sometimes myself when things don't seem to go the way I planned for, even when I give my very best. But a part of me realizes that all that pain and hurt is only temporary. That happiness and gain will replace all that has been seemingly lost.

   If I haven't said this already; or you are still unsure what I want you to realize, remember that you have to do what works for you. What's going to make you happy is important. I may not have all the answers to life, I may also not be able to point out the best methods to have you get through whatever hardships or circumstances you're facing either. What I can tell you though is the best lessons are learned through hardships; because they not only show you who you are, but make you realize that there still others going through much worse.

   Trust and believe in your own potential even when it appears that all hope is lost. Remember we all have a purpose in life and we are set here to not only figure it out, but share it with the world. Life will present to you your true purpose in due time, just believe in your potential unseen and remember your greatness from within in.